I am blessed. period.

I'm for some strange reason, just now realizing how many amazing people I have in my life. It's crazy how it's all just now coming to me.. but for real, the people in my life are so wonderful! Let me just give you some ideas why they're sooo wonderful:

My family rules. Including but limited to; my mom, dad, sister, grandpa, and other relatives.
I have soo many FANTASTIC best friends! (My sister, Kara, Natalie, Becca, Louie ect.)
I've met a lot of new people here in Arkansas! And I cannot wait to meet more! Everyone is so stinkin' nice!
I just recently started working at Salon Blais and everyone there is fabulous! They make me feel welcome and comfortable in being the "new girl."
All of the families I know around here are incredibly hospitable and always take care of me. (The Cornett's, The Mohler's, The Lewis Family, The Farrish's, ect.)
I also work at Express in the mall and I have met some great people there as well.
Also people that are there for me whenever I need them, even if it's just someone to talk to..
(Kara, Brandon, Colleen, Jamie, ect.)
I could go on and on and on.. trust me!

I just feel like I could never thank any of these people enough. They have made my time here in Arkansas so much better and I feel so blessed to know all of them. I know that this is a short post, but honestly, I am speechless in what to write about everyone.
God always knows how to take care of me and it's through theses people that He is making it happen. I don't know what I would do without everyone but I know for a fact that I wouldn't be the same without them in my life.

So thank you so much to everyone and everything you do for me! I truly am blessed. Ya'll make me extremely happy and keep the smile on my face every day!

Love you all sooo sooooo sooooo soooooooo mucho!
 
"It isn't what you have in your pocket that makes you thankful, but what you have in your heart."

I ain't no "Debby Downer"

I'm really not sure where this week went.. I looked at the date of my last blog and realized that it had already been that long since my last post. Hmm, well anyway, moving on..

I feel like I always want to blog when I've had my down days and I'm not sure why..
Since the title of my blog is, "Optimism and Faith; Hope and Confidence" I think I should probably start blogging specifically about those things. Or maybe I should just be living my life in the way that I never have a down day.
I mean, everyone has their moments but it's quite possible that I have them a little too often. Now don't take me wrong, I ain't no "Debby Downer" but my moods aren't always how they should be. If one thing in my day is a little off, it seems to affect my mood more than it should. I try and stay positive but that is one thing I need to really work on.

I need to make a new habit... and that's to wake up and do a bible study in my daily devotional every single morning. Just to start my day off right and have some extra back up for when my mood wants to crash..
The only problem is, I don't want it to feel forced and feel like "I have to do it." I want to just simply.. WANT to do it.
I want God to put that in my heart. Because as I said in my last post, I want to be all for Him. And that can only start with a serious and intimate relationship with Him.
I feeeeel like me and Jesus could get along quite nicely. I mean, I'm prettyyyy sure that He's my type (if I even have a type) and ya know, I think we could get to that serious stage..
We won't just be like a summer fling. He's a little bit cooler than that.

My hope is that my prayers will be answered..
I have true faith in Jesus and that He will put this in my heart. I mean, lets be real.. who wouldn't want a relationship with someone as awesome as me?! Ok, I was totally kidding.. I'm not like that. I PROMISE!! But He's really good at making things happen.. He's a good listener.
And I'm pretty sure, sooner or later, all my passion and drive will be put into Him and strictly Him alone.. He is my one and only. My true LOVE.

As I wrote this post, conveniently, this song was playing...

"Have you ever wanted to be someone else
Have you ever wanted to be someone
Have you ever wanted to reach your dreams
Have you ever wanted life to be more than it seems
I have tasted of a love so wide
That it stops all my time
I have tasted of a love so deep
That it blows my mind
Have you ever wanted to reach up and touch the sky
Have you ever wanted to pack it up and say good-bye
Have you ever wanted someone to care
Have you ever wanted someone to be there
I have tasted of a love so wide
That it stops all my time
I have tasted of a love so deep
That it blows my mind
He is sweet, He is sweet
What your looking for
Is my sweet, sweet Jesus
What You're looking for
Is my sweet Lord."

 Have You Ever

By Shawn McDonald 

Updates, Barf and Flaws.

Since my last post, I guess a lot has happened.
Everything has been positive and I feel like everything is slowly starting to fall into place. God did bring me here for a reason and I'm just trying to keep my eyes open to it.

I finally got a job at a salon, which is SO good! It happened without me expecting it whatsoever! I honestly feel blessed that it happened the way that it did.
I guess it was all keeping my hope in God in knowing that He would take care of me.
I still lose that hope often though. It's a huge problem of mine. I just wish I could believe in Him to take care of me all the time, but me, being my stubborn, anxious little self.. can never seem to do that.

I need to realize that keeping my hope and trusting in Him WILL pay off.
It already has!
He knows what will happen next. I don't.
I am small. He is big.

I constantly fail to wrap my mind around that and grab hold of it.
I'm always consumed with myself. Everything. All about me.. me.. me.

BARF.


My mind has been all over the place this week. And I'm still scared for whats to come..
I can't seem to get over that fear and I don't know why.
I guess what I really need to start doing is practicing what I preach. I need to listen to my own advice. I need to live for God and not for the world.

I feel like the biggest hypocrite in the world. Maybe I'm just being hard on myself.. but if I wasn't, who would be? No one realizes all of my flaws like I do. And if I'm going to keep writing this blog, I need to start living out what I write.

I told myself that this post would be short and sweet, but instead, it turned out to be long and harsh. It's what I needed though. Just took me gathering all my thoughts and writing them down to notice what I was really doing.
I have good intentions, I just don't always follow them.
sooooo...
GOAL STARTING RIGHT NOW: live how God wants me to live. Not how I want to live.

I should of started that a looonnnggg time ago.
Buuuut, better late than never.

Here we go.. deeeeep breath. Ready. Set. Go.